I've lived this. When I’m interacting with a woman, I’m screening her for the above traits. This narrative becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. There’s a saying, “The self is always shining through.” Basically, no matter how hard you try to “make a girl like you” using some tactic, it won’t work because using a technique to attract a woman is in itself a form of overcompensation. The guy who wants to get rich but has a poor family can work twice as hard as his competition, and within a few years he can get to a point where he’s making a six-figure income. https://medium.com/@aghayden/charisma-is-the-most-appealing-quality-an-individual-can-have-6997168b8571 This article titled how to be more charismatic applies just as well to self-confidence and gives you an in-depth how to guide on letting go of your social insecurities. Eat healthy food, and get enough sleep. Changing your life is hard, but what’s the alternative? This sub fucking sucks and most of the time I don't remember why am I still subbed; but we have really good articles like this one from time to time. It’s an American social news aggregation website with a content rating and discussion feature. But at the core it is a very old idea. So once again, be in the top 2% of the male population around the women in the age range you're trying to attract. Like Reddit for example. Any of the four tips can change your life individually, but master all four and you won’t believe the successes you’ll have. If you don’t have a friend who can help you, there’s an unlimited number of fitness guides you can download. If anything, my social skills got worse because I became so overanalytical. Every single time, I attracted her because of who I was. Smile more if you’re female Much of the science of attraction is rooted in biology—and who we think would make a good mate to reproduce with. Most Men And Women Find First Dates To Be One Of The Scariest Parts Of Trying To Find Love, So We Found Out What Men On Reddit Say The Most Attractive Women Do On To Keep Them Coming Back For More. Instead of being the guy who will do anything to get with the hot girl, you want to be the guy who’s interested in the hot girl but hasn’t decided if he wants to sleep with her yet. Being a billionaire probably requires a certain amount of luck, the right family, being born in right time and place, the right genetics, etc. The power of communication. Instead of acting like a guy who would do anything to get laid, you will act like a guy who has an abundance of options. The vast majority of guys don’t have the confidence necessary to take a woman home, and that’s something you can only develop through practice. If you’re willing to treat dating like a skill, you can master it. The same is true in dating. When you’re interacting with a beautiful woman and you’re willing to reject her depending on what she does and says, the entire dynamic changes. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. can be disadvantages that are outside your control. We talk about how to make a lasting impact she will never forget! In fact, the harder you try to get a woman to like you, the less attractive you will be to her. Here are the guidelines for skill selection. Just like confidence, this can’t be faked. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MZCVXRlcm8, https://medium.com/@aghayden/charisma-is-the-most-appealing-quality-an-individual-can-have-6997168b8571, http://masculine-style.com/rugged-refined-and-rakish/, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiAubtXLnFs. It’s not going to make up for a lack of confidence and experience, but it’s a good start. Slow down/extend your speech sometimes, invite him into his senses, compliment him, speak to him from your feelings, make your pleasure a priority, trust him more fully, get in touch with your feminine energy, initiate occasionally, invest in your hygiene, and adorn yourself in a way that makes you feel more beautiful and alive. The same applies to dating. HAVE MORE THAN ONE. If you HAVE to choose, pick the one that puts you around women. ching videos without doing a single approach. By treating dating as a skillset, you can date higher quality women than you would otherwise. How To Be An Attractive Man Key 2: Develop Standards The more women you’re willing to reject, the more attractive to women you will become. Shave you neck for God's sake. Everyone wants to feel attractive, and you deserve to look and feel your best. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. The other key to treating dating like a skill, is to practice. When you’re interacting with a woman, and you expect her not to like you, you’ll act different than if you expect her to like you. My reason as to why I'm still here is to help out. The first would be intimidation since good looking men seem scary in a way since they're often portrayed as very particular men who Worrying about the things outside your control is silly when there are so many things you can proactively improve on. It can honestly be all three all at once XD Speaking from personal experience. Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. For reference, here’s a few of the things I won’t accept in a woman: -If a girl has any kind of drug addiction, I’m out. Not a single mention on the psychology of attraction. For example, if you’re a nice guy, it could be useful to practice using some push-pull to get a feel for what being polarizing means and to get comfortable with being less agreeable. Just a observation: when you said that we can't fake self-confidence, I remembered about Amy Cuddy's quote: "Fake it until you make it!". The word "man" is often used in a neutral sense, lacking either favorable or unfavorable suggestion. Intellectual learning is only useful if you’re spending most of your time in the real world getting real feedback. Here, share an audio of yourself approaching a woman - if your personality has even the slightest amount of charm or positive energy I'd be shocked. They see girls as a means to an end. But 100 years later Musk/Tesla brought them to mass market. Learning how to attract women without practicing is just as absurd as trying to learn any other skill without practicing. Cookies help us deliver our Services. Take driving for example. Got a little older and gained some weight and basically turned incel. Her personality is irrelevant. Username is rugby11 Mentions sports as how to be attractive 3 or 5 times... Hey guys.. Just a thought but maybe theres more to having the opposite sex find you attractive than tackling men in little shorts for 80 minutes. I wrote an program in the mid 90s to schedule rides for a ride company with touch tones and pagers. Were you attractive enough for them to (figuratively speaking) for them to pull your pants down in the produce aisle of the supermarket? Your non-neediness will make you infinitely more attractive than all the desperate guys pining after her. At some point, thins will get easier. So presentation and solving a real problem is much more important than innovation. But the end result is easily worth it. Did you know that Electric cars were a thing over 100years ago? If … I'm no seduction expert but I've been through my share of experiences and whenever I can help someone with a situation that I went through then I'll go for it. If asked, most people would say, “Self-confidence is belief in yourself.” And that’s true, but there’s a key component missing in that definition. Work on Your Hygiene Let’s start with a well Very nicely written. Ok, so you want to be a handsome man, but you don't know how. I'm gunna go out on a limb and admit that. Furthermore, improving your looks won’t make game easy. Imagine though if women approached you and your froze up and shut down? But after 10 years in the game, thousands of approaches, and yes, a good number of “lays” – I’ve found that attracting women isn’t something you can force. I agree with this article and like how the points are relevant to anyone (blokes and non-blokes). I’ve seen numerous good-looking guys fail at game. If you’re naturally a four on a looks scale, I can’t promise that you’ll be able to date Victoria’s Secret models, but you can still bat way out of your league and hook up with attractive girls. Every time we drive - and we live to tell the tale - we become a little more confident in ourselves as a driver. But anyone can make six-figures with enough time and effort. I imagine it as being the same as being an attractive woman, but less amplified. Having a gym buddy will help keep you accountable to working out even when you don’t feel motivated. Just one observation: when u say that we can't fake co. Everything you wrote is gold. This article gives you 15 ways on how to be attractive to women.But it doesn't stop there! But truthfully, no matter what I said, the result would have been the same. Learn how to connect with the ones you're trying to get with! Of raw confidence... Just a thought but maybe theres more to having the opposite sex find you attractive than tackling men in little shorts for 80 minutes. Most of the guys I’ve met who have trouble attracting women (and there are many) have a problem with neediness. Any of the four tips can change your life individually, but master all four and you won’t believe the successes you’ll have. Writing a list of the things you won’t tolerate in a potential sexual partner and rejecting women who don’t meet those standards is a powerful strategy for becoming more attractive to women. The science on what makes you unattractive will shock you... and will make you a more attractive man. I can’t teach you how attract a specific girl using techniques, but I CAN teach you how to be an attractive man who naturally draws women in. Most people would have long thrown in the towel. And it's never enough. How do you actually do that? Lead singer of a band, a competitive fighter, involved in politics at an electable level (even if its campus politics, the point is you are the one running, not supporting), or the teacher of a group of people. People needed a fast way to get rides. Fortunately, there are many ways to be attractive to others, so anyone can be an attractive woman. That said, you can make a staggering improvement in your appearance in the course of a single day. You can overlap almost all of these hobbies. He would gain so much by working on his volume. She might be a perfect ten in appearance, but if she’s narcissistic and uninteresting, I’m not going to sleep with her. You’ll do better if you take a Spanish class, learn salsa and join an intramural team than only learning Spanish. They can be useful to get a feel for a principle of social dynamics that you don’t naturally utilize. I’m no expert on fashion, but here are a couple resources you can look at to get started with: http://masculine-style.com/rugged-refined-and-rakish/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiAubtXLnFs. The first is putting you around women. Treating dating like a skillset is difficult. I’ve seen numerous good-looking guys fail at game. If you walk up to a girl, and she rejects you, you’re going to say, “It’s because I’m Asian. Look, with the above example, I said that the guy with a poor family could make six-figures, I didn’t say he can become a billionaire. If you have trouble being consistent, get a trainer to hold you accountable and provide guidance. It's in r/selfimprovement and titled “How to be An Attractive Man.” The reddit… This is counter-intuitive, but it’s true. Our inner lack of confidence causes us to behave less attractively. At least for me anyway. Posts like the one OP made are perfect material for those new here. Things that make women admire you take more time to develop. Whatever you want to accomplish in life, there are certain elements that are outside of your control. At the same time, no matter how unattractive you are, some percentage of women will be attracted to you if are confident, non-needy, etc. I make friends easily, and am well liked by my coworkers, and in the relationships I have Don’t think about your height, think about your inability to approach attractive women. Of all the times I attracted a woman, not once did I attract her because of some technique I used. This can be things like the way you carry yourself, your vocal tonality, and the way you view yourself. And, naturally, a man who sees a woman as a human being is much more likely to attract her than a man who sees her as the fleshy equivalent of a gold coin. But I’ve been with extremely beautiful women in the past who I didn’t have any chemistry with - and it was crappy. Obviously, when it comes to improving your looks, style is only half the battle. Gents – the attractive man marches to his own beat. When we lack self-confidence with women, we think that rejection is the worst thing that could happen to us. :), Everything you wrote in this thread is gold. And they had something much older they were using. The how and why of getting attracted to people may differ for men and women, and even the simplest or the craziest things can be an element of attraction to women and men alike. Becoming the most attractive version of yourself requires that you invest both time and effort in yourself. Highsnobiety found a super useful reddit thread from user bcbrought96. (and that percentage is probably higher than you think). You hit the nail on the head with this comment, amazing article shoutout to op. What this means will vary from person to person. I’ve read dozens of books teaching men how to attract women with lines, tactics, and tricks. - If you want to date beautiful women, factors like your height, race, etc. If you want to be more attractive, try standing with your arms apart when you’re hanging out with others, since open body language conveys attractiveness. Join us and get motivated. Her values are irrelevant. Attraction is not a choice. -If she’s unhealthily narcissistic, I’m out. (Btw, it’s also useful to write a list of the things you do want in a partner.). On the contrary, when she’s with a less attractive man, she doesn’t sweat it as much and is, in actuality, happier. It takes patience, time, and effort to do so. Imagining what a good basketball shot looks like is completely different from taking the actual shot. Social skills, confidence, and physical attractiveness are all important when it comes to dating, don’t sell yourself short by improving one and neglecting the others. All you need to do is be able to read attraction and screen out the ones that clearly aren't interested, Bro, your self confidence article said it all. - If you want to be a doctor, a low IQ is a disadvantage that’s outside your control. A lot of guys realize that looks matter, so they decide that once they’ve got their looks “handled” they’ll start approaching women. Our society is so rebellious and radical that we credit manhood to any adult male claiming to be a man. Reading is how to do this is the easy part, becoming more The technique isn’t going to attract women on its own, but it might help you get over your insecurities/limiting beliefs. The question is, can this information help hard core cases. The most attractive people I've dated had an inviting livingspace (it was clean and reasonably tidy), didn't need my skills to improve their life (could cook, maintain healthy habits, had hobbies), and were learners (actively filled gaps in their knowledge/skill base to improve their own life). There are two ways a skill/hobby will make you attractive. For many guys just starting their journey, the first step to developing self-confidence will just be getting out of the house, for others it will be something bolder. In my experience, at least, sex is better when you actually like the person. To do so would be selling myself short. It's about a state of mind. Your appearance is something that you can constantly improve, but you’ll never reach a particular point where you’ve “made it”. The more confident you become, the more attractive you will be - because you’ll stop getting in your own way. Plus, if your friend is in good shape, they’ll be able to help provide you with guidance. You'll get stuck on "Now I'm not fat, but now I need a 6 pack. I like this part because in life you've never "made it." Well, how do we become confident in anything? The better looking you are, the higher percentage of women will make it easy for you to pick them up. Every personality is different, enjoys different things, and likes different girls. Men with this mindset don’t meet women to connect with another human being, but to get a sense of accomplishment from sleeping with a girl. Focusing on your looks while neglecting to actually interact with women is a recipe for failure. Even if you're scared as fuck, YOU HAVE TO FAKE IT TO YOURSELF AND DO WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE. Now i'm somewhere in between and working on myself. Now, add smartphones an luck to the mix - you see where it is going. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. I know this as well as anyone. Awesome post, I agreed to everything you said. If you just can’t seem to figure out what you’re doing wrong when it comes to picking up guys, knowing how to be attractive to men will help. - If you want to get rich, having a poor family is disadvantage that’s outside your control. Approaching women can be painful, but not nearly as painful as it would be to settle for a woman you’re not happy with because “she was the best you could get” (which is what the majority of men end up doing). Sounds like someone spends too much time in the basement. Daily showers, shampoo & conditioner (shampoo & conditioner recommended to be used less than daily to preserve hair, I believe), deodorant (for the love of god NOT spray-on Axe), etc. I walked up to a beautiful girl and said, “Hey, I thought you were cute, and I had to say hi.”. He’s unnecessarily limiting himself to only date women that are far worse looking than he is! Mentions sports as how to be attractive 3 or 5 times... Just a thought but maybe theres more to having the opposite sex find you attractive than tackling men in little shorts for 80 minutes. Become a Premium Member We have pioneered the largest worldwide conversation about what it means to be a good man in the 21st century. 19 Ways to Be More Attractive, According to Science It's not about looking like Ryan Gosling. Get a high-end salon haircut. A woman can look attractive from a distance, but if a man feels she does not have a good hygiene when he gets closer, she loses her attractiveness instantly. Looks matter. Furthermore, improving your looks won’t make game easy. You have to develop actual standards. Inventors rarely become wealthy. If you fixate on whether you can get “perfect tens” you’re just going to cause yourself frustration. The only reason I would sleep with that girl is because it would give me a sense of ego-gratification. How to Be Thorough in Your Oral Hygiene Routine - I hope that most of the stuff in this guide on oral hygiene doesn't need to be said and is common sense, but just to be thorough, I‘m including it. Well, I have to say this is good, constructive, information, but theory and practice are different things. You've never arrived, IMHO. Your insecurities will show up in your behavior, and when she rejects you, you’ll think, “It’s because I’m Asian.” Then you’ll become even more insecure, women will like you even less, and so on. They were people I could admire. It doesn’t have to meet all of these criteria. The below answer is fully copied from, I endorse majority of its content so sharing it here- hope it helps How to Look More Handsome: 17 Hacks to Handsomeness - Global Seducer 1. They will happily sleep with any girl because that makes them feel like they “won”. But if you're looking for even more assistance (it's ok, we're not crying, it's just windy outside today), then you could always turn to Reddit, where a thread titled How To Be An Attractive Man is gaining some hefty traction amongst men looking for The Answer. Yet it’s common for guys to spend dozens- if not hundreds - of hours learning about how to attract women, without going out into the world and practicing. You can’t change your race, but you can change many of the other factors that create sexual attraction. For example, the more women you approach, the lower the stakes will feel when you walk up to a girl, because you’ll become comfortable with the possibility of getting rejected. To do so would be as silly as learning how to shoot in basketball, but not how to dribble or pass. So to be an attractive woman, you need to have an impeccable hygiene. Press J to jump to the feed. But this starts with taking a moment to write out what you want (and don’t want) in a girl you’re considering having a sexual relationship with. These fantasies stifle us because they’re so far outside of our reality. I could have been fat and ugly and done way better with women than I did when I was handsome and ripped. We have these fantasies, whether it’s to be a billionaire or to sleep with “10s”. They either like you or they don't. I bought your kindle book "the trial" instantly. How To Be More Attractive To Your Man So that’s it. This is counter-intuitive, but it’s true. Appearance, especially fitness is a universally undeniable sign of health, as you can buy nice clothes, but it takes sweat and tears in actually crafting yourself for a hot body. I could give countless examples like the above. Reading is how to do this is the easy part, becoming more attractive to women is a long-term process. Similarly, a short Asian guy with a below average face can succeed with women IF he works twice as hard as his competition and focuses on the factors that are under his control. Similarly, imagining what a good approach looks like is completely different from doing the approach. It’s no secret that self-confidence is attractive, but what is it, really? It shows that you take getting with a girl way too seriously and that you see yourself as incapable of getting another girl of her caliber if you wanted to. #4 is a second date dealbreaker for 86% of women - make sure YOU'RE not doing it. Every time you take a social risk, and come out the other side unharmed, you will become a little bit more confident. There are groupies for every male endeavor. Dating coaches who say factors like your race and height don’t matter are lying. It takes years for their ideas to become practical. Happy cake day and I agree, great post from OP . Only real practice can. So, how to be more attractive is … When you see women as mere sex-objects, it’s impossible to have a real human interaction with them. Manhood isn't This is how you position yourself as a network bridge and have some mystery. When it comes to being good at science. We only use techniques because on some level we don’t believe we’re good enough by default, so we try to make up for our inadequacy with a line or a trick(1). According to a study from SUNY-New Paltz, … Go to https://www.getroman.com/RMRS for a free online visit. His level of self-confidence is under his control, his style and fitness are under his control, and his ability to take social risks is under his control. Fortunately, most of the factors that make a man attractive to women are under your control. It’s not one or the other, it’s both. When I was younger I was objectively better looking and got women 100% from them approaching me. This is because attraction isn’t something you do, it’s something you are. And really, 95% of guys in the seduction community have plenty of room to improve their style. The Reddit thread "How to be an attractive man" contains a ton of advice to help men fix up and look sharper. The second is making women admire you. You're an UGLY man... if you have any of these 10 bad habits. One of the founders of GE, Steinmetz, actually started producing them. I’m not advising you to avoid being part of a group – this should be an important part of your life – but don’t do things just because everyone else does. "Your appearance is something that you can constantly improve, but you’ll never reach a particular point where you’ve “made it”. Foreign language classes that women take, dance, yoga, charity/volunteer work, Forces you to compete with other men (in person), Foreign language, musical talent, astrological/occult knowledge, reading people. When you tell yourself, “Girls don’t like Asians,” you’re going to see your interactions with women through that lens. I've dated gals and blokes, and one striking and common turn-off is an adult who lives in chaos, usually manifested in a messy abode, an unhealthy/coincidental/convenient eating habits, and usually noticable gaps in practical life-skills (laundry, cooking, personal finance). Package it right, it becomes Uber. That´s the hardest part for me. Really good post. I've had interactions with beautiful women who had similar negative energy and I was so turned off I left.

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